Last night:
Compensated 16 Novant 1<--Novant Eliminated
Herd 18 Incented 8
Compensated 18 GMAC 17<---- GMAC Eliminated
NEXT WEEK!!
V/S Winner of Compensated/Incented for the Championship
Absent Next Week:
Nobody
Herd Notes:
Herd is playing in their 3rd consecutive title game
Herd has mercy ruled every team in the league at least once
Herd has beaten every team in the league at least twice
Game Notes:
You dont know how it feels. You dont know how it feels. You dont know how it feels, to be Herd.
On perhaps the most magical evening the softball universe has ever been witness to, the MIGHTY PURPLE HERD avenged an early season loss to the Incented, laying the mercy rule on them by a final score of 18-8, catapulting the Big Purps into their 3rd consecutive championship game appearance! One could literally taste the intensity in the air on this perfect fall evening as the Herd was able to jump on the upstarts from Incented early with fundamentally sound defense and crucial situational hitting. Death, Taxes and sensational music from Miley Cyrus were the only given's in life until this season. You can now add Bryan Timmons doubles to that list. Timmons recorded 3 doubles on the evening, breaking the 69 year old Tar Heel League single season doubles record once held by Shamus L. McGrew of the now defunct Butte County Pirates. Congratulations to Timmons for this prestigious and historic record. Timmons could not be as successful as he is if it were not for Erin "Shake it!" Haneline's consistent domination of the oppositions defense with her rugged yet very feminine like play night in and night out. Hanelines hitting as of late has become somewhat of a Masterpiece of grace, discipline and emotion. While her hitting was sensational, it was her pregame festivity appearance that had Herd Management giddy as a little schoolgirl. Its the simple things in life that please Herd Management the most, simple things like delicious ice cream, beating compensated and showing up for pre game festivities. The three epic-est stars of the night however were the Trio of Jessica Hendrix, Shannon Craft and Amanda Redding. And Heather Haneline Miller. And Erin and Yancy. While Yancy was 0-3 at the plate, she did bring in 50% of the Herd fans last night, and that can not be understated or overlooked. She also was able to shift the defense to allow Timmons easy shots down the left/center field area for his 3 doubles. At this point in the season, there are literally NO WORDS that can even begin to describe the beyond magnificent play of Heather Haneline-Miller. Miller arrived to the field obviously jacked up on Life and Bojangles tea ready to prove that she is one of the worlds most physically intimidating figures to ever play Co-Rec softball. Miller did not disappoint, driving in multiple runs, playing fantastic defense and responding to numerous emails. Despite Amanda Redding's consistent attempts in trying to destroy the mind set and physical well being of Herd Management, Red had one of her best games offensively on this evening, culminating with her devastating slide into home early in the game. Redding's intensity on this evening was nothing short of spectacular as evident by her championship-like 20 minute jaunt from her car to the playing field. Shannon Craft continues to lead the comeback player of the year race, reaching base on every one of her at bats. While we are not sure what exactly Shannon is coming back from, it is still relevant. Shannon also proves to be the most calming influence on the team, arriving early and remembering to run out her base hits this year. The headline of the evening must go to The Freak, Jessica BY GOSH Hendrix. Hendrix, a fan favorite (literally), turned in quite possibly one of the most dominating games in co-rec softball history. Not only did she completely and unadulteratedly DOMINATE her position at 2nd base, even dodging yet another attempt at wiping her out, she drove in 5 runs and made one of the most heart wrenching slides Herd Management has ever been witness too. Bystanders could notice as Hendrix slid safely into home, a single tear from Herd Management's eye, symbolic of the effort given by one of the most amazing players in league history. Jessica. The. Freak. Hendrix.
While the Herd Women were fantastic as always, the Herd Men stepped up their game in a HUGE way on this evening. Chad "The Gazelle" Biggie continues to defy the laws of gravity, physics and mass to speed ratio's on a game by game basis and has broken out of his mid season slump in a BIG way. Chad-Dub, perhaps the worlds most complete softball player in the history of the Universe made plays on defense that simply should not be allowed. It is simply unfair to the rest of the league to have a player of the caliber of Dub on one team. Scott "Goose" Walkush, one of Herd Management's favorite all time players, was magnificent on the mound as well at the plate. Walkush had the Incented defense so confused that at one point in the game they were actually playing with 6 outfielders and relying on the instruction from the local crack seller. The one player that simply stole the show however was C-Nix. The play at short that robbed Incented's 3rd baseman of a triple would go down in history as perhaps the best single play made in softball history, if not for the fact that CNix does this on a nightly basis. Not only did Nix/Hendrix infield juggernaut stymie any attempt at an Incented rally, their bats accounted for 67% of the Herd offense on the evening.
Herd Business:
While it is indeed a ultra sad moment to know that our unbelievable journey is one week from its historic end, we must put our emotions behind us for the time being and focus on the task at hand. Herd will play either Incented or Compensated next Thursday at 7:30 for the rights to be crowned the 2009 Tar Heel League Fall World Champions. Compensated/Incented will need to win 3 games next Thursday to upset the heavily favored Herd. while the Mighty Purps will simply just need to win one. I encourage each and every one of you to round up your friends, mates, children, family and random pedestrians and encourage them to come support Herd nation Next Thursday. After we secure the world championship, we will be having an end of year Herd BASH at the home of Bryan Timmons.
We can almost see it........
***Evening Awards***
The "Shannon Craft" award for being Shannon Craft goes to Erin Haneline for her in-restroom dry off routine. You know that had to come into play at some point.
The "Redding/Haneline" award for most gut wrenching slide goes to superstar Jessica Hendrix AND Amanda Redding YET AGAIN for their slides that brought tears of joy to Herd Management, tears of agony to Incented management and Tears of Fears to Compensated. Everybody wants to rule the Herd.
The "Shane Battier" award for being in 37 places at once on defense goes to fan favorite C-Dub for his extraordinary super hero like play in the outfield. Who's yo Daddy?!?! C DUB!!!
The "Christmas Nutcracker" award goes to Amanda Redding. It was painful and beautiful rolled into one magical moment.
The "5 hour energy drink" award goes to Heather Haneline Miller for being by far the most hyped up person in the history of Herd warm-ups. WOW!! Did you sleep? DID YOU SLEEP!????!?
Random Herd Facts:
Hellen Keller's favorite color is Purple
The Herd cannot love, they can only not kill.
The Herd doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
The Herd destroyed the periodic table because they only recognize the element of surprise.
The Herd owns the greatest poker face of all time. It helped them win the 1983 World Series of poker despite holding just a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly Card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game Uno.
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